Sue Edwards's blog

After 9/11, the U.S. government installed a color-coded alarm system to alert us to the threat of enemy attack—from red for severe risk, down to green for low. They knew that there are seasons when we need to be particularly diligent related to our security, but our responses should be based on solid evidence. It is foolish and wasteful to be on red alert all the time.

I stirred the eggs on my plate and made polite conversation with a half dozen women circled around the breakfast table. I was the retreat speaker and this was an opportunity to learn more about the women attending.

Next to me sat Briana, a tall black woman with sculptured features, saucer eyes, and a thick British accent. While the other women laughed and shared stories of late night games and conversations, Briana’s downcast eyes seldom left her plate. I wondered why, so I softly attempted to engage her. 

“Where are you from, Briana?”

Continuing the topic of sacred siblings, let's consider the top priority if you want to work together with men in such a sacred sibling partnership. I believe your number one goal should be the pursuit of spiritual and emotional health.

First, we must become a sister from the inside out. That means that we work hard to become spiritually and emotionally healthy. We commit to knowing God intimately. We talk to Him through a constant attitude of prayer. We seriously work toward emotional health.

People like to hide their faults. Secret sins are all too common. This prideful, protective reaction is natural. Who wants the world to know that we struggle with forbidden desires, particularly sexual ones? But Christians are called to be spiritual. Our churches should be hospitals for the hurting, places of healing and restoration. Light heals. A jaundiced baby needs to be exposed to intense bright light to become healthy. Sunshine feeds God’s green earth through photosynthesis. Secrecy is counterproductive.

Jonathan Safran Foer, a Jewish New Yorker in his twenties, collected memories of his family—photos, cards, false teeth, handfuls of dirt—all sealed in individual plastic bags and mounted on a wall. Eager to know more about his family roots after the death of his grandparents, Jonathan embarks on an elusive quest to Ukraine, specifically to explore what happened to them during World War II.

How does a church act when they treat one another as family? “One another” phrases are used fifty-eight times in the New Testament. They describe a caring and respectful family ethos. They help us live together as a Christlike community, applicable in mixed gender relationships. Today, and in future blogs, I'd like to examine several examples of the one another’s in the Bible.

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. (Rom. 12:10)

Mixed-gender communication is imperative for healthy sacred sibling relationships. But we find many women struggle. They are either too quiet when they need to speak up, or they say too much at the wrong time. Let’s look at a woman who found that middle ground between silence and aggression. She was not afraid to tell Jesus exactly what she needed.

Ethos is the ministry environment you create. What impacts ethos? Many factors—for example, the depth of the leader’s relationship with God; their spiritual, emotional, and mental health; their view of themselves and others; their view of their role as leader; their comfort empowering others; and, if the team is mixed-gender, their view of the other sex.

If you were blessed with a biological brother, you may be better prepared for ministry than an only child. Today we are looking at another benefit of growing up with a brother.

Unity